It's Been a While....

Since I posted anyway.  I was stressed.  Putting it simply.  Putting it more complexly (if that is even a word...) my work load blew up, my company is working towards a completely different style of work flow changing everything from they way are desks are set up to our assign agencies.  I took a CPCU exam two Friday's ago.  And for those of you who've taken them, you can understand.  All the while, I'm trying to take care of my 19 month old and keep my sanity.

I was so absolutely stressed out that I was breaking out in hives for about a week!  I would start to get really itchy.  If I could hold off scratching too much, it was just painful for a little bit.  But sometimes I couldn’t and I would just go to town.  The result was a ton of painful hives that took a little while to go away.  The worst was one day as I was getting out of the shower, the insides of my thighs were kind of itchy.  I scratched both sides a little bit and after I’d dried off, I put some comfy PJ pants on.  Well, I think the loose fabric brushing against my thighs didn’t help because all of a sudden I was scratching like crazy.  The result?  A conglomerate of hives…that looked like One. Giant. hive.  I sat in a chair with my pants down and ice on them to help keep me from scratching.  I thought it was stress but had never had that before.  I hadn’t changed any detergents, cleaning solutions, used new body products, etc so I really didn’t think it could be an allergy like that.  It would also happen in random places.  Sometimes it was my hands, one time it was my shoulder, once my foot, so yeah, it was just weird.  It was during that week that I made the decision to prep my resume and get ready to leave.  I’d like to find another job now but I’m really thinking about going back to school and without describing step by step at this point, waiting it out here another year would be the best situation.  If I can make it.  If it’s affecting my health physically and mentally that badly, I should not stay but it might be getting better, we’ll see.

In the meantime, another update on my depression progress.  I’m doing FABULOUS!  I feel stronger mentally than I have in a long time.  I feel like I can get frustrated but not feel like I want to hurt something (or myself).  When I was going through those extremely stressful weeks mentioned above, I didn’t feel like killing myself.  And that is saying something.  I cried and am getting a little emotional at the thought that I didn’t feel that way.  The first time in a long long long time.  It just feels so good to not feel so hopeless and helpless.  I don’t know if it’s just the goLITE therapy light but something has changed and it is the best feeling in the world. 

In other news, last night we were all in my room and Crinkles was running around like a mad Crinks.  I’d started leaving the room to go downstairs and I heard a thud.  The Bage was in there with him and I heard him crying pretty hard.  I went back into the room and The Bage was holding Crinkles consoling him when we both noticed the blood pooling in his mouth.  I ran and got some gauze.  In his fall, his tooth went through his lip!  His tooth is fine from what we can tell but his poor lip.  The bleeding stopped fairly quickly, we got some ice on it, and called the doctor.  He stopped crying and it didn’t look awful so we wanted the doctor’s opinion before rushing him to the hospital for the potentially more traumatizing procedure of stitches.  The doctor said as long as it wasn’t a gaping hole he should be fine, just to keep an eye out for infection.

Another random note, Saturday was gorgeous!  I was outside in pants and short sleeves or a light jacket the whole time.  Gavin and I also went on our first bike ride of the year.  Can’t wait to get in more!  Then Sunday (and today, Monday) it has snowed and has been freezing cold.  Lame.

Okay well I do have to work  but that’s all I’ve got for now.

Pace,
Megan